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Transcript
This is a transcribed copy of Dog's Best Friend.
Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Pilot" Next: "Boom Night"


The following transcript is sourced from Disney+.

IN A SCI-FI-LIKE FANTASY, A PUPPY COVERED IN NEON PINK GOO RUNS ACROSS THE SCREEN, LEAVING GOO ON THE FLOOR. A DOOR RISES IN THE BACKGROUND AND OUT COMES DYLAN, WEARING AN ASTRONAUT SUIT. HE HAS TWO VACUUM-LIKE GUNS--ONE FOR EACH PAW--AND IS SITTING ON A SMALL VEHICLE. HE LOOKS AROUND AND NOTICES A PUPPY QUICKLY RUNS ACROSS, LEAVING MORE GOO ON THE FLOOR. DYLAN BEGINS USING THE GUNS TO SHOOT AWAY THE GOO AS THE PUPPIES RUN AWAY.

00:00:55,583 --> 00:00:57,792

♪♪

27

00:01:05,250 --> 00:01:07,083

[gun powering up]

28

00:01:07,166 --> 00:01:08,417

Hey-ya! Ha-ha!

29

00:01:09,750 --> 00:01:11,458

Argh! Ha-ha!

30

00:01:12,583 --> 00:01:13,959

[making shooting noises]

31

00:01:14,166 --> 00:01:15,333

Space junk, owned!

32

00:01:15,417 --> 00:01:18,291

[puppies giggling]

33

00:01:18,375 --> 00:01:19,375

[laughs]

34

00:01:19,917 --> 00:01:22,250

Wahoo!

35

00:01:22,333 --> 00:01:24,542

Dolly, you are so not helping.

36

00:01:24,625 --> 00:01:27,375

What do you mean, Dylan?

I'm polishing the bannisters.

37

00:01:27,458 --> 00:01:29,375

Oh. [gasps] I missed a spot.

38

00:01:29,583 --> 00:01:31,125

Again! [laughs]

39

00:01:31,208 --> 00:01:32,875

[all exclaiming]

40

00:01:33,792 --> 00:01:35,375

Bow-wacka-wow!

41

00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:37,875

Whoa, hey! Aah!

42

00:01:37,959 --> 00:01:44,959

♪♪

43

00:01:45,959 --> 00:01:47,875

[yawns] Ooh!

44

00:01:47,959 --> 00:01:49,542

[all laughing]

45

00:01:49,625 --> 00:01:51,250

Good luck with the chores.

46

00:01:51,333 --> 00:01:52,917

OK, I'm off to work.

47

00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:54,000

[Dolly] Bye, Mum!

48

00:01:55,500 --> 00:01:56,625

[bike horns]

49

00:01:59,166 --> 00:02:01,750

-[snoring]

-[Mum] Busy night shift, Doug?

50

00:02:03,583 --> 00:02:04,667

Worked like a dog.

51

00:02:04,750 --> 00:02:05,834

Dad!

52

00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:08,667

[all] Dad! Dad! Dad!

53

00:02:08,750 --> 00:02:09,709

See ya!

54

00:02:09,792 --> 00:02:11,542

[Dylan] Ohh, I just cleaned!

55

00:02:12,166 --> 00:02:14,166

[groans]

56

00:02:14,917 --> 00:02:15,917

Huh?

57

00:02:17,166 --> 00:02:19,166

[snores, barks]

58

00:02:20,500 --> 00:02:21,917

[snores]

59

00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:24,917

Wow. Clarissa's human is so well-trained,

60

00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,917

he does all the work! [sighs]

If only we had a pet.

61

00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:30,083

Hear that, Dizzy?

62

00:02:30,166 --> 00:02:31,625

Sure did, Deedee.

63

00:02:32,750 --> 00:02:33,834

[sneezes]

64

00:02:33,917 --> 00:02:35,583

So let's get Dylan a pet!

65

00:02:36,250 --> 00:02:37,417

[Dizzy] Yeah, yeah, yeah!

66

00:02:38,041 --> 00:02:39,291

But where?

67

00:02:42,208 --> 00:02:44,709

Ooh, here's the perfect place!

68

00:02:44,792 --> 00:02:46,041

The pet shop!

69

00:02:46,417 --> 00:02:48,250

[DeeDee] What's on offer?

70

00:02:48,333 --> 00:02:51,125

Yours must be zee black coffee?

71

00:02:51,208 --> 00:02:52,166

[Dizzy] No.

72

00:02:53,166 --> 00:02:54,291

[exclaims, grunts]

73

00:02:54,375 --> 00:02:55,792

[Dizzy] No way!

74

00:02:56,041 --> 00:02:59,792

Pout. Post. Pout. Post. Pout. Post. Pout.

75

00:02:59,875 --> 00:03:01,959

-Definitely not.

-Post.

76

00:03:02,125 --> 00:03:03,500

That one's cute.

77

00:03:09,333 --> 00:03:11,166

[sighs] Nobody wants me.

78

00:03:11,834 --> 00:03:12,917

We'll take ya!

79

00:03:13,333 --> 00:03:15,583

[both barking]

80

00:03:15,667 --> 00:03:17,250

Hey! Look at you two!

81

00:03:17,333 --> 00:03:18,500

So adorable!

82

00:03:18,583 --> 00:03:20,125

-[barking]

-Oh, what's the matter, girl?

83

00:03:20,208 --> 00:03:21,750

You need me to come with you?

84

00:03:21,834 --> 00:03:23,417

-OK, let's do it!

-[barks]

85

00:03:23,917 --> 00:03:25,667

[Dylan making shooting noises]

86

00:03:26,500 --> 00:03:27,500

Clear!

87

00:03:27,583 --> 00:03:29,291

[Dizzy and DeeDee]

Dylan, open the door!

88

00:03:29,375 --> 00:03:30,750

Dylan, open the door!

89

00:03:30,834 --> 00:03:33,166

-Dizzy? DeeDee?

-Dylan, open the door!

90

00:03:34,208 --> 00:03:35,291

[both] Ta-da!

91

00:03:36,750 --> 00:03:39,458

-[DeeDee] Surprise!

-Aah! A human!

92

00:03:39,542 --> 00:03:40,625

[Dizzy] It's your pet!

93

00:03:40,834 --> 00:03:42,125

You know, to do the work!

94

00:03:42,208 --> 00:03:45,291

-Can we keep him?

-Can we call him "Mr. Fuzzy"?

95

00:03:46,041 --> 00:03:48,792

[both] Please! Hmm?

96

00:03:48,875 --> 00:03:52,750

No way! We cannot have

a human in the house!

97

00:03:52,834 --> 00:03:54,792

[Mr. Fuzzy exclaiming]

98

00:03:54,875 --> 00:03:56,291

Aah! He's in the house!

99

00:03:56,375 --> 00:03:57,792

[Dizzy] Here, Mr. Fuzzy!

100

00:03:57,875 --> 00:04:00,667

[Mr. Fuzzy exclaiming]

101

00:04:01,709 --> 00:04:03,667

[all laughing]

102

00:04:03,750 --> 00:04:06,291

Uh, who let the human in?

103

00:04:06,375 --> 00:04:07,917

[Dylan] I'll handle this.

104

00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:10,709

Uh, listen, sir, I'm sorry,

105

00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:12,417

but clearly there's been

some sort of mis--

106

00:04:12,500 --> 00:04:13,500

[barking]

107

00:04:14,542 --> 00:04:16,917

Ho-hoo! Someone needs a tummy tickle!

108

00:04:17,375 --> 00:04:20,208

-Tickle, tickle, tickle!

-Must. Fight. Tummy tickle!

109

00:04:20,291 --> 00:04:22,709

Can't resist... Mr. Fuzzy--

[laughing]

110

00:04:22,792 --> 00:04:26,250

-[puppies laughing]

-Yeah, you are so handling this.

111

00:04:26,333 --> 00:04:27,750

Oh, come here, you!

112

00:04:28,417 --> 00:04:31,166

No way! Ugh! It might have fleas!

113

00:04:31,250 --> 00:04:33,959

-Yeah, couldn't you--

-Have found, like a--

114

00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:35,083

Shinier one?

115

00:04:35,166 --> 00:04:36,959

-Ahh.

-[bell dings]

116

00:04:41,583 --> 00:04:44,917

You know, maybe a pet

isn't actually such a bad idea.

117

00:04:46,750 --> 00:04:47,792

[giggling]

118

00:04:47,875 --> 00:04:49,625

I mean, it could be educational

119

00:04:49,709 --> 00:04:52,500

for the pups to care for another creature.

120

00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:56,000

And a pet will always give you

unconditional love.

121

00:04:57,542 --> 00:04:59,834

Kind of the opposite of a sister.

122

00:05:00,375 --> 00:05:03,792

Wait a minute. You just want him

to do all the work.

123

00:05:03,875 --> 00:05:04,917

[all laughing]

124

00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,959

Well, it's not like you're much help.

125

00:05:07,041 --> 00:05:08,041

[groans]

126

00:05:08,125 --> 00:05:10,458

-[Mr. Fuzzy whistling]

-Oh, look how smart he is.

127

00:05:10,542 --> 00:05:12,458

He's thirsty and just instinctively knew

128

00:05:12,542 --> 00:05:14,834

-where to find the drinking bowl.

-[toilet flushes]

129

00:05:14,917 --> 00:05:16,125

I don't think he's drinking.

130

00:05:16,875 --> 00:05:19,625

Aww. He's marking his territory.

131

00:05:20,583 --> 00:05:22,750

[Mr. Fuzzy scatting]

132

00:05:24,250 --> 00:05:25,417

-Well, it works.

-[retches]

133

00:05:25,500 --> 00:05:27,667

I'm never going near

that drinking bowl again.

134

00:05:28,792 --> 00:05:32,500

[Mr. Fuzzy] Wow!

Whoever lives here is dog-crazy!

135

00:05:32,709 --> 00:05:34,750

Unless it's just you dogs. Heh.

136

00:05:36,291 --> 00:05:37,792

Nah!

137

00:05:37,875 --> 00:05:39,750

[humming]

138

00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,542

Ooh! Hm...

139

00:05:44,125 --> 00:05:46,458

Ahh... Aah!

140

00:05:47,834 --> 00:05:50,333

Ohh, what's this?

141

00:05:50,625 --> 00:05:53,083

No! Not the stroking machine!

142

00:05:54,583 --> 00:05:57,083

Oh! Oh! Oh! Whoa!

143

00:05:57,166 --> 00:05:58,792

-Oh!

-[Mr. Fuzzy screaming]

144

00:05:58,875 --> 00:06:00,750

-[toys squeaking]

-Bad human!

145

00:06:00,834 --> 00:06:02,625

Uhh... soz, pups.

146

00:06:02,834 --> 00:06:04,667

-He's silly.

-[laughing]

147

00:06:05,083 --> 00:06:08,208

You know, I could get

to like you, Mr. Fuzzy.

148

00:06:08,959 --> 00:06:10,959

-[Mr. Fuzzy cooing]

-Oh! [chuckles]

149

00:06:11,333 --> 00:06:14,291

Well, I guess maybe we don't need

a stroking machine

150

00:06:14,375 --> 00:06:16,166

now that we've got a human.

151

00:06:16,291 --> 00:06:17,834

Now, let's get him trained up!

152

00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:20,375

-[vacuum running]

-Huh?

153

00:06:21,917 --> 00:06:24,417

[grunting]

154

00:06:24,917 --> 00:06:25,917

Hm?

155

00:06:26,166 --> 00:06:27,500

Aah!

156

00:06:28,333 --> 00:06:30,083

[snickers]

157

00:06:30,166 --> 00:06:33,250

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

158

00:06:34,375 --> 00:06:35,625

[laughing]

159

00:06:40,291 --> 00:06:41,500

Whee!

160

00:06:43,583 --> 00:06:44,583

[chuckles]

161

00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:50,000

[squeaks]

162

00:06:54,458 --> 00:06:55,458

[chuckles]

163

00:06:55,542 --> 00:06:56,542

Aah!

164

00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,291

[all chuckling]

165

00:07:03,166 --> 00:07:04,458

Whoa!

166

00:07:06,375 --> 00:07:07,750

Whee!

167

00:07:07,834 --> 00:07:08,875

[squeaks]

168

00:07:08,959 --> 00:07:11,208

[puppies giggling]

169

00:07:11,291 --> 00:07:13,041

-Aah!

-[giggling]

170

00:07:15,834 --> 00:07:16,834

Hey!

171

00:07:20,083 --> 00:07:21,458

[puppies giggling]

172

00:07:25,458 --> 00:07:26,583

[grunts] Ohh!

173

00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:28,000

[toys squeaking]

174

00:07:28,083 --> 00:07:30,166

[yawns] I'm tryin' to get some--

175

00:07:30,250 --> 00:07:31,250

[laughing]

176

00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:34,250

Uh-- Why is there a human in the house?

177

00:07:34,333 --> 00:07:37,291

-Uh, well, that's kind of, maybe...

-[Mr. Fuzzy yells]

178

00:07:37,375 --> 00:07:38,709

-my fault.

-Unh! [grunts]

179

00:07:39,458 --> 00:07:41,417

-He's Dylan's--

-New pet!

180

00:07:42,417 --> 00:07:45,625

New pet?! You do know

that humans can live to over 100!

181

00:07:45,709 --> 00:07:48,125

That's 700 in dog years!

182

00:07:48,208 --> 00:07:50,667

-Ten generations!

-Right, yes!

183

00:07:50,750 --> 00:07:53,625

Which means, when he's trained,

he'll look after us

184

00:07:53,709 --> 00:07:54,959

for ten generations.

185

00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:56,375

-Uhn!

-[both laughing]

186

00:07:56,458 --> 00:07:57,583

Oh-oh!

187

00:07:58,250 --> 00:08:01,458

Son, humans are hard work.

188

00:08:01,542 --> 00:08:03,917

They need constant exercising!

189

00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,750

You gotta take 'em

for a lotta walkies in the park!

190

00:08:06,834 --> 00:08:09,208

-[puppies] Park?

-Trigger word!

191

00:08:09,458 --> 00:08:11,709

[puppies] Park! Park! Park!

192

00:08:16,083 --> 00:08:19,458

[all giggling]

193

00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,458

-Uhn!

-Ohh!

194

00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:26,125

Come on, boy! Come on!

195

00:08:27,625 --> 00:08:30,250

-Ohh...

-I'm gonna teach you to play fetch!

196

00:08:30,750 --> 00:08:31,750

Ahh...

197

00:08:32,208 --> 00:08:35,166

There you go. Now, come on. Throw.

198

00:08:35,250 --> 00:08:36,333

Throw...

199

00:08:38,625 --> 00:08:40,583

Hm... Oh, all right, then.

200

00:08:41,250 --> 00:08:42,250

-Mmmnah!

-Hey!

201

00:08:42,333 --> 00:08:44,250

Now, fetch!

202

00:08:44,667 --> 00:08:46,583

-[Dylan barking]

-[screaming]

203

00:08:46,667 --> 00:08:49,375

-Good boy!

-Bow-wacka-wow!

204

00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:51,542

[puppies yapping]

205

00:08:51,625 --> 00:08:56,208

[all laughing]

206

00:08:57,250 --> 00:08:59,291

[puppies cheering]

207

00:09:00,417 --> 00:09:03,417

[puppies yapping]

208

00:09:03,875 --> 00:09:07,333

Whoa! I'm feeling sooo...

209

00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:10,458

-...snoozy.

-[puppies yawning]

210

00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:12,959

[smacks lips, snoring]

211

00:09:13,083 --> 00:09:15,166

[Dylan sighs]

212

00:09:15,250 --> 00:09:16,875

[Mr. Fuzzy snoring]

213

00:09:17,417 --> 00:09:19,250

-[sighs]

-[Dizzy] Here, Mr. Fuzzy!

214

00:09:19,375 --> 00:09:20,959

Do ya wanna try the kibble pump?

215

00:09:21,041 --> 00:09:22,542

[clanging]

216

00:09:23,166 --> 00:09:25,041

Huh? Aah! No pushing buttons!

217

00:09:25,125 --> 00:09:27,500

OK, everybody stay calm!

218

00:09:28,333 --> 00:09:30,208

[exclaiming]

219

00:09:30,291 --> 00:09:32,125

The food machines are in meltdown!

220

00:09:32,208 --> 00:09:34,542

I got this! Unh!

221

00:09:35,166 --> 00:09:37,125

-Yow!

-Dad! [chuckles]

222

00:09:37,208 --> 00:09:39,542

I think you've got some food on your face.

223

00:09:40,041 --> 00:09:40,917

Whoa!

224

00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:42,875

Oh, my dog! Oh, my dog! Oh, my dog!

225

00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,041

Oh!

226

00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:46,000

Ehh-- I'll shut down the kibble pump!

227

00:09:46,083 --> 00:09:49,125

I've got the bowl flinger! I think!

228

00:09:49,208 --> 00:09:54,375

♪♪

229

00:09:54,458 --> 00:09:56,834

Heh! Ha! [grunts]

230

00:09:58,959 --> 00:10:00,625

Wha--! [grunts]

231

00:10:00,709 --> 00:10:01,750

Aah!

232

00:10:01,834 --> 00:10:03,792

♪♪

233

00:10:03,875 --> 00:10:05,709

[accordion playing]

234

00:10:06,792 --> 00:10:08,041

Aah!

235

00:10:08,125 --> 00:10:09,250

Grr...!

236

00:10:09,333 --> 00:10:11,041

[grunts] Ha!

237

00:10:11,750 --> 00:10:14,125

[machine powering down]

238

00:10:16,375 --> 00:10:17,583

[puppies giggling]

239

00:10:17,667 --> 00:10:20,542

-[Mr. Fuzzy groaning]

-Bad, Mr. Fuzzy! Bad!

240

00:10:21,041 --> 00:10:23,041

-[tweeting sound]

-Oh. Sorry.

241

00:10:23,834 --> 00:10:26,709

[straining]

242

00:10:28,041 --> 00:10:30,166

-Dylan.

-[Mr. Fuzzy straining]

243

00:10:30,792 --> 00:10:32,959

No, Dad. We can't get rid of him.

244

00:10:33,041 --> 00:10:36,125

But Mr. Fuzzy is part of the family now.

245

00:10:36,208 --> 00:10:38,250

[straining] Ohh.

246

00:10:38,667 --> 00:10:41,000

[groans, grunts]

247

00:10:41,375 --> 00:10:44,333

-Ow. Ow. Ow. Whoa! Oof.

-[toy squeaks]

248

00:10:45,125 --> 00:10:46,625

[DeeDee] Does he have an owie?

249

00:10:48,542 --> 00:10:50,291

-Aah!

-[puppies] Aww!

250

00:10:50,375 --> 00:10:51,709

My phone!

251

00:10:52,500 --> 00:10:55,250

-Oh, the poor, dumb creature.

-[Mr. Fuzzy sobbing]

252

00:10:55,333 --> 00:10:56,333

[sobbing continues]

253

00:10:56,417 --> 00:11:00,166

Oh, maybe I can't take care

of Mr. Fuzzy properly.

254

00:11:00,625 --> 00:11:03,500

I guess it's just not fair to keep him?

255

00:11:03,583 --> 00:11:06,542

Son, Mr. Fuzzy needs to be

with his own kind.

256

00:11:06,625 --> 00:11:08,500

Even if it breaks your heart.

257

00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:10,291

Heart! That's it!

258

00:11:10,375 --> 00:11:12,667

Let's help Mr. Fuzzy follow his heart!

259

00:11:13,542 --> 00:11:15,500

[Mr. Fuzzy] Hey! Come on! Give it back!

260

00:11:16,375 --> 00:11:19,792

-Give it back!

-[Dylan] Here, boy! Come on!

261

00:11:20,875 --> 00:11:26,667

♪♪

262

00:11:27,542 --> 00:11:29,417

[Dylan] It was meant to be.

263

00:11:30,166 --> 00:11:33,041

[cries] Goodbye, Mr. Fuzzy.

264

00:11:33,125 --> 00:11:35,625

-[sobbing]

-[puppies] Aww!

265

00:11:36,125 --> 00:11:37,291

Come here, bro.

266

00:11:37,375 --> 00:11:39,792

-[Dylan sobbing]

-[Dolly] Aww, that's it. Let it out.

267

00:11:39,875 --> 00:11:43,208

[puppies chattering]

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