Poetry Scam/Transcript

Poetry Scam

Transcript

— This is a transcribed copy of Poetry Scam. —

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Previous: "Perfect Match"

Next: "Crushed Out"

Dylan: Clouds are spots, way up high. If you just see spots, do you still see sky? -sigh- Ever see anything more blue?

Dolly: No. Never ever ever!

Dylan: "Wha?"

Dolly is expressing her crush and swooning over Hansel the Husky. Sappy music is played while pink blossoms swirl across beaming Hansel in the pink background. Hansel shifts his blue eyes on Dolly as she crushes in the reflection of them.

Dylan: Oh, Hansel. Of course. Will you just go over and say hello already?

Dolly: Ohhhh, okay. So um uh, hello! No, too formal. Um, yoohoo! Nah, too sappy. Hi, Hansel! I'm Dolly, the... dog! You're a dog! I'm a dog! We're all... dogs... Why do I end talking so funny? It's... those eyes.

Dylan: Clouds are just the closest part. The sky beyond is endless dark!

Dolly: "Hi, Hansel! I'm Dolly. Do you like spots? 'Cos I got spots."

Dylan: In that dark is endless stars. Just see spots, you miss the mark.

Dolly: Hi, Hansel. Uh, clouds are spots. Way up high. Wha? Oh. Dude, your poems in my head now! Go practice on someone else. We have like 100 brothers and sisters.

Pups.

Diesel: "Yeeeeeee, oof. (imitating Pearl Policehorse's voice) My own with deadly appointed object at 11 o'clock.

Dylan:

Diesel & Pearl: New wind pursuit.

Pearl: I'm taking you into custody.

Dolly: *sighs dreamily, then clumsily trips and falls* Huhhhhh.... Waa oof!

Hansel: That happens around me sometimes. I'm not sure why. You okay?

Dolly: "Hi, Hansley. I'm Donsel. Donzel? *hem* Dolly. I-I'm your new, hello? Aheh, you wanna, I mean, why you wanna? I mean, let's do stuff. Friends! Normal friends!

Hansel: Wow. A gymnast and a poet.

Hansel catches a basketball that was about to strike Dolly. Hansel deflates it with his jaws and tosses it to the dogs that were playing with the ball.

Hansel: Hey, watch where you're throwing! Sorry about that.

Dolly: Uhhh, I'm just gonna go now.

Hansel: No, no! Please, more poetry.

Dolly: Uhhhh.... Clouds are spots, way up high. If you just see spots, do you see the sky? Umm... Clouds are the closest part, the sky is endless dark. In that dark is endless stars. Just see spots, you miss the mark.

Hansel: Wowww... So you're a deep thinker. Hehe probably why you trip over your paws, huh?

Dolly: :Ohoh they're not my words they're just-"

Dogs:

Hansel: None of my friends get me. But you, Dolly. Your poem speaks to my inner wolf. Got any more?

Dolly: Oh yeah, tons.

Hansel: Cat? Oh, so cliche. Listen, I gotta take care of this. Uh um, meet me in the sedentary at dusk, okay?

Dolly: "Whoohoo, ahah! I got a date I got a date, ahah! (realizing) Oh. I got a date..."

Dolly: -sigh- You can do this. Serious poetry. Clouds, stars, skies and stuff. This poetry is making me -sigh-.... lose my ruff.

A pup giggles in a very puppy-like way.

Dolly (now rapping): And if I can't rhyme, that's just fine because everything comes out silly. And poetry poetry isn't my cup of... tilly! And when I'm Billy nilly filly so take a gilly, and rhyme with frilly...

Attracts more pups and Dylan.

Dolly (rapping): I'm a night dog, day, morning dog too, but am I a poetry pooch? Nuh-uh, I'm just Dolly Dilly Doggy Dog Doo!

Pups: Yaayyy! Dolly Dilly Doggy Dog Doo!

Dolly: "Yeah, don't think Hansel's into silly dilly somehow."

Dylan: Hey, that was pretty-

Dolly: "Awful? Appalling? Ughh!"

Dylan: "I was going to say amusing? And the puppies sure seemed to dig it."

Dolly: "Okay, I may have kinda said your poem to Hansel and he kinda connected with it. And I sorta let him think I wrote it and now he wants more and I-"

Dylan: 'Wait. Back up. Did I hear you say Hansel connected with my poem!?"

Dolly: Uhhhh.... Your welcome.

Dylan: And he wants to hear more? Wo-ho-how!"

Dolly: Uh, sure. Listen. I could try your stuff out on him for ya.

Dylan: You'd do that? Because I've always wanted my stuff out there! I just... public speaking, you know?

Dolly: Sure. Just so long as he *ahem* thinks they're... mine.

Dizzy: Hey. Isn't that called lying?

Dolly: It's called helping your brother!

Dylan:

Diesel: (imitating Clarissa's voice and impression) "Just who do those dalmatians think they are?"

Clarissa: "-Are? Not even purebred."

Dolly & Dylan:

Dolly:

Da Vinci: "I prefer statement cone."

Dolly:

Dylan:

Diesel: "I dig it. No more chewing.

Dylan: "Okay. You're coming with!

Diesel:

Dylan:

Dolly:

Hansel: "Don't tell me. Another fall?

Dolly: Actually, it's a statement cone. Totally on trend right now.

Hansel: So about those verses.

Dolly: Coming right up. Grrrgh, arughhh... *itching herself* Poetry always me itch.

Dylan: That's the signal! Okay. *ahem* What is the distance between the you you are and the you others see?

Dolly: What is the distance between the you you are and the you others see?

Hansel: You get me. You so get me.

Dolly: In every mirror a second's self which is the water in which is the watch.

Hansel chews on a bone for his contempt.

Diesel bites his bandaged leg.

Dylan: Don't chew that!

Dolly: Don't chew that!

Hansel: -gulp-

Dolly: Well I'm.... aheh... reciting.

Hansel: Of course, Dolly. That was rude. Encore!

Dylan: Consider the leash who holds who...

Dylan is sitting on Diesel and chomps on his butt.

Dylan: Heyaaagh don't chew your leg!

Dolly (rapping): Heyaaagh don't chew your leg! You'll have to get stitches redone... you know that's not fun... here, chew my leg instead. OW! You're actin' silly! Wanna go back to the vet!? You'll have to stand on a scale, and check your bits! Timeout... one minute... TWO MINUTES! (now speaking) I'm sorry, I don't know what-

Hansel: Your words. They're intriguing!

Dolly: You like it?

Hansel: I love it. Hey, there's a poetry slam at the bandstand tonight. You must perform clouds are spots.

Pups:

Dolly:

Pups

Dylan:

Dolly:

Dylan:

Dolly:

Dylan:

Pups:

Dylan:

Pup 1:

Pup 2:

Pup 3:

Pup 4: Inconsploocious.

Big Fee: It's a rat's word. Everyone's strategies. Earth for grabs. But it's all just rubbish if a guy gets some tasty grub *bwwsshh*

Spencer: "Yeah, no."

Roxy:

Dolly:

Pup:

Dolly:

Audience: -gasp-

Fergus: So-ho not cool pinching stuff that doesn't belong to ya! *continues slurping from a slush that a man with earplugs has.

Roxy: "It takes guts to come clean. Still proud!"

Pups: "We still love you sis!"

Pup: "Conspicuous!"

Hansel: "But if it wasn't you Dolly, then who spoke to my inner wolf?"

Dolly: The real poet is... Dylan!

Audience

Dylan:

Dolly:

Pups

Dylan:

Pups:

Dylan:

Dolly:

Dolly & Dylan:

Dylan: Clouds are just the closest part. The sky beyond is beyond endless dark.

Audience & Pups:

Dolly:

Hansel: -gasp- It was him all along!

Dylan: Do yours too!

Dolly: I don't have any.

Dylan: Yeah you do! Your freestyle from earlier! That's the real you.

Pups: Clouds, stars, skies, & stuff! Clouds, stars, skies, & stuff! Clouds, stars, skies, & stuff!

Dolly (rapping): Uh, uh, uh, uh uh

Clouds, stars, skies 'n' stuff

This poetry is makin' me lose my ruff

And if I can't rhyme that's just fine

'Cos everything comes out silly

And poetry isn't my cup of tilly

And when I'm billy, nilly, filly

So take a gilly and rhyme with frilly

I'm a night dog, day dog

Morning dog too but am I a poetry pooch?

Nuh-uhh

I'm just Dolly dilly doggy dog doo

(Dolly dilly doggy dog doo!)

Dolly: (laughs) Come on you guys!

Hansel: Pup pop hip hop is so very well for puppies, but... it's just so mainstream. So Dylan, talk to me about dots, spots, cloud metaphors.

Dylan:

Hansel: Genius.